Thanksgiving was always a big deal for me. I hosted a big family meal every year. Then my husband and I separated and everything changed.

The first Thanksgiving after our separation I broken heartedly cried out to God. “It‘s not fair!”  I said. “Everyone used to come here.”

 I loved cooking for my children, my siblings, my in-laws, and many as many friends as wanted to join us.

It all ended. My kids didn’t know where to go. My in-laws didn’t want to come to ex’s house. Everything felt broken and wrong.

My heartbreak was real, and I was confused.

Then I heard the voice of the Lord, that still voice that quiets your heart.

“Do something else,” He said.

So, I did—I planned a day after Thanksgiving family gathering to put up the Christmas decorations. That worked, for a while. 

But in the following years I did not make putting up Christmas decorations a tradition. After Tim and I got married, it seemed even more difficult to gather with family for the holidays. Tim had not celebrated Christmas growing up, or even birthdays. He didn’t raise his sons with those expectations.  My daughters didn’t know where to go–I didn’t even live in the house they used to live in; I had a new husband; their dad had a girlfriend; they had their own in-laws to gather with; the grandchildren celebrated with their in-tack grandparent families. 

There was no real falling out, just a drifting into different patterns.

The lack of family gathering got worse when Tim and I moved to Sequim. Now we were four hours away from his son, David, my daughter, Heather and their families. Tim’s oldest son, Seth lives in Montana, my oldest daughter lives in Colorado. We rarely get together with any of them.

I long to have a closer relationship with my daughters, but I can’t seem to make it happen.

Last week, on Shabbat, the word the Lord gave me 30 years ago came back, “Do something different” He had said. That word came to mind as I looked around the table in front of me. Eighteen people gathered there. We call them mishpachah (משפחה), Hebrew for “family.” They come every week to worship, celebrate and study the Word.

I am so thankful that we can “Do something else.”

In addition to all the people who come to This Place every week, we have more members of this mispachah who gather every week for ladies’ Bible study and on line.

Bless you all!

May your holidays be full of joy, family, friends, and faith.